8 Days of Honoring Legacy- Day 8!

My final post on honoring legacy has to be to the first woman that gave me life—my mom!

From the first time I laid eyes on her I knew that she was handpicked for me.  She is not only beautiful on the outside, but she is also amazingly stunning on the inside.

My mother was the first person that taught me to care--about others and myself.  You see, she has dedicated most of her life to the ministry of servicing others, either through counseling or through providing her services where it was needed.  Although she is semi-retired, she continues to serve the elderly that need the love from another woman. She also taught me to care for myself; for my personal growth and my own empowerment as a Christian woman.

She taught me the value in working hard for what you want.  There is no end to her days as she is the multitasking queen!  Her dedication to excellence is truly remarkable; she wants things done right even if it means to start over and do it again.

When I was growing up we didn’t have many nice things.  I remember having to purchase clothing and items from thrift stores but my mother would take whatever was purchased, fix it and adorn it to make it different and make it mine.  I never felt that I was missing anything.  She has always loved me unconditionally and has encouraged me at each key point of my life.

She is also my shopping partner.  We both love to shop, we both like nice things and we both love to save money while buying nice things.  She reminds me, Silvia you work hard so buy yourself the things that you like.

This post can easily become a mini-book because there is so much that I can say about my mother.  She is a woman to be admired, she is a woman of excellence, a wise woman and best of all—the godliest woman I know.  I am the luckiest “girl” in the world to have her as MY mom.  Once again, God gave me the best and I will forever be thankful to Him for her.

Happy Mother’s Day to the most beautiful Mom in the world!

 

 

 

 

 

8 Days of Honoring Legacy- Day 7

My youngest sister Kery was the last sibling that God blessed me with.  She has always been not only a risk taker, but also someone that I look up to because of her enthusiasm for life and fun!  After all, in Kery’s book her birthday is a national holiday.  So much so, that when I was pregnant with my youngest daughter and her C-section date was scheduled on her birthday, I begged my doctor to please change it lol!

Kery didn’t have the luxury of easing into motherhood after her marriage.  No, her marriage to Scott came with an added bonus—an automatic young son!  She quickly rolled up her sleeves and has loved him as her own from the first day she met him.  She doesn’t shy away from a challenge but instead says…”bring it on”.

Kery later had two children of her own, (Brandon and Briana) two great kids that call her Mommy each and every day.  Because Kery is also a military Mom, she has had to adjust to raising her children in different cities and schools.  I admire her adaptability skills in her new environment and her enthusiasm when a new assignment is presented to them.

Kery, although you are the youngest in our household, you are building a beautiful legacy each and every day!

8 Days of Honoring Legacy- Day 6

My sister Jackie was a welcomed blessing to our family for multiple reasons.  Our departure from Argentina was mostly due to my second sister passing away when she was only 16 days old.  Jackie was a true welcomed blessing. 

As a young child, Jackie was not only energetic but the life of the house.  The girl loved to sing at the young age 1 and would hold even a drumstick as a microphone.  Jackie always had this hidden comedic flare to her, you never knew when the joke was coming or when she would dress like Steve Urkle and surprise you!

However, Jackie did grow into an amazing woman.  She is also a peacemaker everywhere she goes; her calm demeanor puts everyone at ease.  Her no drama zone allows everyone to just take a chill pill in her presence.  Jackie can go from not saying a word and observing her surroundings to speaking for an hour straight without stopping to breathe!

As a grown woman, mother of two teenagers I admire how she loves to spend time with her family—they truly are everything to her.  She is also a spiritual mother to many in her church family as she co-pastors a church alongside her husband.

Jackie is still funny, still loves to sing and yup, still loves to make us laugh with her silliness!   I honor you little sister for becoming a woman of integrity to be respected and admired by all that have the privilege to really know you!

 

 

 

8 Days of Honoring Legacy- Day 5

My dearest Aunt Lily, the only one I have near to my heart happens to be one amazing woman.  Like her mother, Nona Chabela is oozes peace everywhere she goes.  She is a great woman of God and is always ready to sit with you and have a cup of tea over a bite of her delicious cakes.

You see, I believe that I get my creativity from my aunt Lily.  There is nothing that she cannot create in a cake form.  The woman’s talent is endless and sought out by many.  She works at a very prominent bakery in Miami, Fl.

My mind seems to always want to create something and the more details the merrier in my book—I  love details!

Aunt Lily was blessed with a special needs son and she has shown me what love, patience, true strength, determination and what true faith in god really looks like.

Tia Lily, I admire you for more reasons than you know.  I know that you will make an amazing grandmother to your Sebastian.  We are all blessed to have you in our lives!

8 Days of Honoring Legacy- Day 4

The day I met Lydia I sensed her immediate approval to join the Arvelo family.  She treated me like one of her friends and I felt right at home.

However, that is not what I admire most about Lydia but it’s her determination and persistence at whatever dream she wants to accomplish.  She doesn’t know the meaning of giving up or failure.  Her example is to keep going until you get to your determined destination.

And speaking of destinations, she is a world traveler!  Yes, she works hard but also plays hard.  I can only hope to visit the world like she has.

Lydia is not only my sister in law but also a big sister to me.  Although we may not see each other or speak for prolonged periods of time, I know in my heart that if I am in need of a conversation, prayer or anything else, I can count on her to be by my side.

Lydia I know you are still building your legacy, but my dear sister I honor you because you are building a class act for all of us to follow!

 

8 Days of Honoring Legacy- Day 3

I met this amazing mother of three before I met her son.  She was kind and quiet.  The second time I saw her she brought along her son because she already knew that she had found someone for him.

My amazing mother in law is not a woman of many words but a woman that loves deeply and passionately.  She is a model mother to her children and is the true meaning of the term “mother bear”—don’t mess with her children.

I owe my Caribbean cooking skills to this woman.  From the moment I had a taste of her food I knew that I wanted to learn to cook like her—she was my Puerto Rican Barefoot Cantessa!  You never leave her side hungry or even just right, if you are not wobbling out of her presence from eating so much food she is not happy.  My daughters used to spend the summer with her and come back 10-15lbs heavier and so happy that grandma did their treats several times a day.

I am blessed beyond words to have her today in my life.  She may not be a woman of many words but she will be sure that you know how she feels about something. 

We lovingly call her “Abuela Tomasa” and there is no one else like her!

8 Days of Honoring Legacy- Day 2

Today I honor the legacy of another grandmother—my paternal grandmother.

What’s incredible about this woman is that I remember her so vividly.  The last time I saw her was when I left Argentina and I was 5 years old.  I never had the opportunity to see her again,  but I feel that I resemble her in so many ways.

Nona Justa was in a sense, the opposite of Nona Chabela.  She was opinionated, she never missed an opportunity to use her voice and there was no doubting what she thought or felt.

Nona Justa had a life of little luxuries, a lot of hard work and moments where she was a single mother to 3 boys.  She was tough but she needed to be during those moments in her life.  She demonstrated incredible strength although life didn’t hand her too many things.  She was consistent and reliable.  She was true to herself and to those around her.

Although I didn’t have the pleasure of growing up with her my mother reminds me that I have a lot of things from my strong grandmother.

Nona Justa (whose name means justice), may you see the little parts of you in my life.  May I run this race with the determination and the tenacity that would make you very proud. 

I love you and will always remember  you until we see each other again!

8 Days of Honoring Legacy...

During a recent episode of Super Soul Sunday,  Iyanla Vanzant said something that went deep in my soul.  She spoke about the women that paved the way to where she is today.  I couldn’t help and think about the women I was blessed to have known and yet, the millions that came before me and the millions that will come after me that I will never meet.

In my 46 years of life, there have been lots of women that have one way or another shaped the woman that I am today.  And yet, I know that there are many that I haven’t met yet—I look forward to meeting those precious lives too!  However, it made me ponder on the women that have had a direct impact in my life.  As I think of the week ahead that is leading up to Mother’s Day (in the US), I want to take the time to honor each one of them.  Please join me by also honoring the women in your life!

On this first day of Honoring Legacy, I would like to honor my maternal grandmother many know as Nona Chabela.

Nona Chabela was not only my grandmother but everyone’s grandmother.  As soon as you met her sweet and quiet disposition you were instantly in love with her and wanted to adopt her to be your very own grandmother.  She not only loved everyone but was sure that you knew that she loved you—you felt the love that she gave out.  She wasn’t a woman of many words but her hugs were priceless and I miss them so much these days.

I know that I am blessed above and beyond because I got to grow up with this amazing human being.  She loved God with all her heart and she loved people.  Her family was everything to her and she would do anything for you, no matter what the sacrifice.

Nona Chabela left this world on July 30, 2009, way too soon but she left a very notable mark for all to feel and see.  Just today my husband reminded me that she was a woman that dispersed peace everywhere she went.  Miguel also saw her as his grandmother and she poured her love on him from the first day she met him.

I will forever be honored by her legacy as a woman of strength and love in her very quiet and meek ways.

I honor you today Nona and send you lots of kisses up to heaven!

 

The Joy Experiment...

I don’t know about you but 2016 has had a very interesting start for my family and me.  It seems that we’ve survive one storm after another.

Let me share a little about my story with you…

About 26 years ago my love of my life, my husband Miguel, was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis (MS) before our 2nd year wedding anniversary.  We were a young couple with more questions than answers, with more doubt rather than faith.  I was a very young bride with a one year old staring at a very uncertain future.  Fast forward about 26 years and here we are today.

Miguel is a walking miracle and we thank God for all He has done in his life.  His MS has been relatively stable and for that we are grateful!

However in February of this year, I was on my way to a Women’s Conference our church was hosting when I get a call from my husband.  He usually calls within 5 minutes of me leaving the house to go anywhere just to talk about... well….anything!  However, this call was different.  He said, “I’ve fallen and there is blood everywhere and I am not sure where it’s coming from.”  I have to tell you that we were both relatively calm about it.  He then tells me, “I think I should call 911”—to  which I agreed and told him that I was about 15-20 minutes away from the house but would try to get there as quickly as possible.  He then asks me the dreaded question “Did you lock the front door?”  To which I responded…”Yes”.  Now we both knew that this was not a good thing for the paramedics.  We both knew this would mean a much more difficult task for them to be able to get to him.  God was good to us and although that day my bathroom looked like a crime scene, Miguel was fine and walked away with only 7 stitches to his head.

A couple of weeks later I go to the ob/gyn for my annual exam to which I am told that I need a biopsy of the uterus, full blood work, sonogram of the thyroid and oh yeah, an MRI of the pituitary gland because my prolactin levels are elevated.  I couldn't help but think.....seriously?!?!?!?!

The last few weeks of testing have been overwhelming on my body, mind and spirit.

You see none of us are free of life’s challenges.  No one!  However, not everyone is willing to share their story, challenges and defeat with others. If we only knew how sharing helps others in just the right time in their lives.

In the middle of all this I found myself losing my JOY.  I had noticed my JOY starting to decline and while there were short-lived moments of happiness and joy—most of the time I was empty!  I thought to myself I need to get on the journey back to Joy.  This is not going to happen accidentally, I will need to be intentional about it.  I started listing things that bring me joy because when we are going through the ugly its hard to figure out what those things are.

As a result of this I created The Joy Experiment.  It is 30 days of intentionally doing things that I know in the depths of my heart bring me joy.  Your Joy Experiment may look different than mine but in the month of April why don’t we walk that journey together…our journey back to finding and experiencing joy?

Starting April 1st I will post one activity or thing a day that brings me joy and you can follow my thread and post yours.  There is power in knowing that there are others joining you, let us gather the sisterhood and empower one another with JOY!  Let’s not give into what we are going through and let us be intentional about doing what makes us smile.

I look forward to walking this journey with you and i hope you are as excited about this as I am. Hey, you can start working on your list today and be ready to post your item this Friday, April 1st.

Here is to experiencing intentional Joy......Here is to The Joy Experiment! 

Cheering you on my friend,

Coach Silvia 

Friendships, Cheerleaders, Empowerment Partners and so much more...

Welcome to March my friends!

March is a very special month for me for several reasons.  For instance, it marks the end of winter and the beginning of Spring.  Spring is a time when beautiful things grow and flourish.  There is something different in the air and in our moods. There is a sense of expectancy!

March is also National Women’s History Month, International Women’s Day (March 8th) and it’s also the 3rd birthday of Women’s Empowerment Services. 

All wonderful events that celebrate women!

In honor of these holidays and our 3rd birthday—we want to celebrate BIG!  So how do we plan on doing this? 

Drumroll…..

We are starting a new group called Empowerment Partners.  You my dear have survived the winter months (whatever that may mean to you and, I am not only talking about the weather).  Some of us are hanging by a thread to those January goals.  How exciting would it be to keep them alive by joining a group of like-minded women who are ready to cheer you on.

Empowerment Partners is a Facebook Group where we will come clean and share 1 or 2 goals we want to accomplish in March in order to finish the quarter strong.  I am a strong believer of breaking down goals and setting new ones on a quarterly basis.  By the end of the year you will see that you led a more focused view of what you desired to happen in your life in 2016.

So how do you know if this group is right for you?

  • Are you an encourager but sometimes feel that you need a little encouragement yourself?
  • Are you ready to crush your goals but need a little nudge, push or some accountability?
  • Are you looking to meet new women?
  • Do you need encouragement from someone speaking directly to you?
  • Are you looking for a safe environment to share some of the “low” moments?  We all have them but certainly do not want to announcement to the world!
  • Are you also looking to share some of your “high” moments and wins to a cheering group in order to get the energy you need to keep going?
  • And lastly, Are you willing and ready to be a cheerleader in someone else’s life?

If you answered yes to any of these questions then, this group is a perfect match for you.

This FREE Facebook group will be active between March 7th through March 31st.  I am giving you a couple of days to get your act together (saying that it with a very loving tone:-) in order to hit the ground running on Monday the 7th .

Are you ready to say yes?  If you are interested just put your name under this post and you will be hearing from us.

Ladies, let’s build a platform where we celebrate each other!  Negativity and discouragement will come, but let’s do what we can to find a place where we will be encouraged to not only GROW but THRIVE!

Cheering you on,

Silvia

Coach Silvia 

Starting Over....

I love to go to the salon and treat myself to a wonderful manicure; it’s truly is a treat for me! I don’t seem to get them enough of them and I particularly love the whole experience and the no chip option is a dream come true.  A fresh coat of nail polish always seems to give me a boost of confidence and joy.

Yes, a little bottle of color does all that for me!

However, on this particular day I didn’t have the time to go to the salon and had to do my own nails— something that happens too often due to my hectic schedule.  I was fine with the neutral, pale pink color and actually did a decent job at it.  I said to myself “Great, one less thing on my to-do list”!

And then it happened…..

Yes, I know you’ve been there too, I started to do things and messed up about 3 of the nails on my right hand.  UGH!  REALLY!!!  I tried to fix it with an extra coat of polish and even a fresh top coat, but nothing seemed to fix it.  I finally gave up and decided that it was time to start over.

I find that there are moments in our lives where a patch, a fix, a stitch or even a small adjustment cannot fix a situation.  We need to step back, look at what is in front of us and just start over.

You see, society has taught us that starting over may be looked at as failure or even as a waste of precious time however, some things just cannot be fixed.  There are things like finances, relationships, meals, work projects that cannot be fixed easily and it will require more time and energy then to just scrap the original plan and start over.

Something as simple as my nails actually turned out better than the original when I stopped trying to fix it.  The new was better than the original and quicker than spinning my wheels in trying to fix it.

Here are some tips that you can do to evaluate your situation:

-          Step back and be honest with yourself if a fix will truly give you the desired outcome.

-          How much energy, time or money will be required if you start versus trying to fix it?

-          Ask others close to you for advice on whether starting over is really your best option.

-          Finally, imagine yourself with the new “product”.  How does that feel?

Staring over may not be as bad as you think.  Stop trying to fit into what society thinks and do what is truly best for you today!

Cheering you on,

Silvia

Coach Silvia 

How to find the right Coach for you...

Happy 2016 Empowered One!!!

Can you believe that we are almost at the midway point in the first month of the year?  This year seems to be going at the same lightning speed as 2015. 

A few weeks ago I was speaking to a dear friend who said to me “Silvia, I am so confused, everyone is calling themselves a coach these days.”  I fully understood what she was saying because I see it on my newsfeeds, emails and even some of the events I attend.

There are many great coaches out there—and may I add with a unique specialty and expertize to offer their clients.  However, as with everything, there are great ones and there are some that are imitating the hard work and financial investment that some of us have put into our careers and passion.

So, as a consumer how do you know where to go or what to do?  I for one, am always on the lookout for a great coach.  I have several that I respect and admire and are wonderful at what they do.  For example, I currently have the following coaches:

1.)    Branding Coach

2.)    Business Development Coach

3.)    Fitness Coach and,

4.)    Wellness Coach (specifically for essential oils therapies)

However, I am also on the lookout for a great financial coach.  I have a couple of folks that I have been observing and following to see if they would be a right fit for me. 

So what are some of things that I look for in a coach?  Here are a few items:

1)      How personable and caring is the person?  I don’t know about you, but while I am looking for accountability I also want a person that wants me to succeed and truly cares for me.

2)      Find out when and where the coach was trained.  Not all coaches are created equal! 

3)      Is the coach a learner? Your coach needs to remain not only relevant but also be a learner at heart in order to bring you the best and latest methods in the industry.

4)      Look for what type of information this coach puts out.  What are their passions and skills?  Have they been consistent over a certain period of time?  Does this coach post sporadically or inconsistently?

5)      Does their style work for me?  There are different styles of coaching and there is a match for almost everyone so there is no need to settle if their style is not for you—keep looking.

6)      WORD OF MOUTH!  Yes, listen to your friends or coworkers because that is some of the best real time reference that you have.

Let’s not forget the elephant in the room—fees!   There is a wide-array of fees that coaches charge for their services so look for the one that best fits your current financial situation.  If you are unable to afford one on one sessions with your coach at this time, look to see if there are lower priced webinars, group memberships or even group sessions that you can be part of until you are financially ready to make the investment in yourself.

I believe that we should all have at least one coach to help us move forward in life.  While some of us already have the discipline to motivate ourselves to move forward, there is always room for another perspective from someone that can see the bigger picture and has the skills to hear what you are saying “between yours words”.

Happy New Year Empowered one.  I know that if you set your mind and actions to do it, 2016 will be an unbelievable year for you!

Cheering you on,

 

Silvia Perez Arvelo                                                                                                                               Life Breakthrough Coach

Sometimes you just need to power down....

What is wrong with this thing??  Why does it tell me that I am not connected to the internet when I see that I have several bars?  GRRR, I have a lot of things to do today and no time for inefficient things!!!

I tried everything on my iPad only for my frustration to continue to grow.  It was pointless and I was wasting valuable time- that I didn’t have!

So in my anger, I just powered the dumb thing down and took a deep breath.  This was pointless, I said to myself and sat there quietly and motionless with my thoughts.

Why is it that we need to power down everything in our lives in order to be able to “listen” to our thoughts.  We drive ourselves crazy with work, multi-tasking all day long, and on most occasions only to go to bed  just thinking about the things that we didn’t accomplish.

We fail to see how much we have already accomplished in our very busy and productive day.

We fail to see that sometimes we just need to power down!

How’s my iPad doing, you ask?  It’s fine.  Powering it down did the trick.  Guess what?  All it needed was a little break from doing so many things and working such long hours.

I wonder how many of us just need to take a break, power down and enjoy doing nothing?  You may be thinking but who has the time for that?  I have so many things that need to get done, people are expecting things from me and I have commitments that I cannot break.

I get it!  However, you owe to yourself and to those around you to take a break.  So what are the benefits of taking a break?

  • You allow your brain to restore and refresh (like my iPad)
  • Your body has a moment to distress and just be
  • Your mind is more alert
  • Your family and friends get to enjoy the whole you
  • You get to enjoy the moment you are presently living instead of jumping on to the next thing
  • You start to feel a surge of gratefulness for the things you are able to do and the people that you love very much
  • You give permission to those around you to also take a break

So, today:

  • Power down your electronics and give them a break too
  • Slow down and savor that cup of tea or coffee
  • Make that phone call to your dear friend to just “talk”
  • Go out and eat something that you have been craving (or cook that favorite dish that everyone loves)
  • Sit and read a book (yes, the book that you bought months ago)

My dear empowered one, love on yourself today and remember you need your energy to live an empowered life.

Cheering you on to relax,

Coach Silvia

The Turning of Life’s Seasons…

Fall happens to be my all-time favorite season! I thoroughly enjoy the change in the air and temperature.  Living in south Florida makes you appreciate the 5 degree drop in temperature and the change in humidity levels like you wouldn’t believe. I also enjoy the change in recipes, the precious intentional gatherings with friends and family.  A change in colors in our wardrobe, of the leaves and trees.  I love it all!

However, there isn’t only a change in our environment but also in our thoughts.  A change in our attitude to one of gratitude and thankfulness.

For some, the Fall can also represent moments of vulnerability. A season that may represent exposing issues or things that we may be hiding for one reason or another.

Embracing this season in your life can represent letting go of people or things that either no longer serve you or are no longer good for you. In every season of our lives there should be some growth.  However, growth only happens when we are honest about where we are today and where we want to go.

leaves.jpg

Here are some tips on how I evaluate this season in my life:

  1.  I first enter this season with an attitude of gratefulness. Gratefulness for the little things, as well as the big things.
  2. I make sure that I am expressing grace and forgiveness towards myself first and then to those around me. This is very important as I tend to be very hard on myself– especially during this time of year. 
  3. I make a list of my accomplishments during the last 10 months. Yes, I first look to what I have accomplished before looking at what I haven’t .
  4. I review my goals set for the year and see if they still fit the person that I am becoming. Sometimes we enter the year with certain goals and then realize that some are no longer a priority in our lives.
  5. I dig deep to see what attitudes, habits and people I need to shed from my life. You see, a tree sheds its dead leaves during this season because it needs to prepare for the season that is coming next. It cannot withstand the next season with extra baggage or the weight from the previous season.
  6. Finally, I list how I want to end another year of my precious life. I know that in the next couple of months I will be looking forward to a new year, a new beginning and I will need to bring forth the best of what this present year gave me and nothing more.

So there you have it my friend….happy shedding and preparing for what is next for you!

Remember, I am always here cheering you on,

Coach Silvia